I Can't Stop Thinking About This.

There have been many HIGH-LARIOUS moments in my internet life, but I can now unplug the wifi because finally, FINALLY, after 13 or so years of searching, I have found the funniest thing ever. NAILED IT!

Funny bone, tickled!

BawbwaWawa-Factor

Anybody else crushing on these two older gentlemen?
Because I am! Despite today's rumors that LA Reid is going to sabotage Simon's girls and give them bad advice, I'm sticking with his nice guy act. So dreamy, these two.

I had decided long ago to avoid 'X-Factor' after they fired my true love, Cheryl Cole.
I tried to go without this show, but the heart wants what the heart wants. And it wanted X-Factor, badly. With the live shows starting tomorrow, I just wanted to put it out there that my money is on Drew. This 14 year old angel is more mature than I could ever hope to be and her voice causes me to seizure. Seriously, she's amazing. And she's got Beiber Fever! I am assuming Beiber is going to make an appearance at some point and they'll sing a duet, as I silently cry, pretending there is something in my eye. Mom--I'm going to need you to stop slacking around because you're "retired" and vote for her since I can't do it here. I know you're getting older, but do not get confused and vote for these little hussies.
Tiah and Simone CANNOT win X-Factor! I'll have lost all faith in humanity should one of these girls win. Tiah is beyond pitchy and Simone is SO full of herself. Do not like.

May the best (wo)man win (Drew)!!

A Treat. For You. It's Better Than Candy.

Suuup?! As suggested by the title, I have quite the treat for you. It's a look into something very personal to me, a place few dare to go. My purse!

I can't remember which magazine does this, maybe US Weekly, but you know how they take a look into what celebrities carry in their purses? We're also going to do that here! My purse is WAY better than a celebrity's though! If I remember correctly, one of the blogs to the right here did this awhile back, but she carried around a journal and nice things. Not here, you will not find that here! If at some point during this blog you have gotten the impression that I have my life pulled together, my apologies. I'm a hot mess.

Example I. My makeup bag.

(Even the table looks disgusting. Hold your judgement, that was a plastic patio table at the hotel we had been living in.)

This bacteria laden bag and brush are probably the reason my face is so busted and suffering from adult acne. You can't really see, but I only use the finest makeups such as, Cover Girl concealer, blush, and bronzer, Maybelline eye shadow and mascara, and Rimmel eye liner. Nothing but the best for me! This combination of makeup gives the perfect "caked on, face is more tan than your neck" look and I highly recommend it. I've rocked that look for years.

Example II. Welcome to my purse.

This is the crap I have hanging from my shoulder day in and day out, and is now beginning to give me shoulder pain. It's totally worth it though. Who knows when I may need an empty bottle of Ibuprofin? What if not one, but two toothbrushes fail me? Well, I've got three just in case. What if Diego gets bored and he wants his favorite tiny blue plastic toy you see laying there. Well, I've got it! Dog owner of the year, I win.

Let's end on a very happy note and thank Derek for the first new and hole-free underwear I've had in two years! He's so good to me! I promise to keep them out of the dogs reach, washed on gentle, and hung dry so that they are wearable for at least four years.